I think Facebook is great. Not a perfect platform, but for my needs, it's great. I can post thoughts, funnies, or pics, and everyone on my Friends list can look (or not!) to their heart's content. I don't have to print off a pic and mail it to a few people, then ask those people to share it when other friends/relatives happen to come around. I don't have to remember a joke, and the punch line, when I can just post it, either to a specific person's timeline, or to my own, and tag those I would especially like to have see it.
The point I would like to ponder is; when a group is created for a common purpose or interest, should we consider it to be entertainment, or do we ultimately attain an emotional attachment to whatever cause, person or interest we have signed up for?
My prime example of this started when social media and TV informed me of a family in need. The story was picked up as the family needed help in a medical situation. (To protect their privacy I will not be using their names!) The story caught my attention, because a) it was a little kid. b) it was my hometown. c) the disease had personally affected my family. It tugged at my heartstrings, and while I would not be able to help them with their quest, as I was too old, too far away, and the wrong gender, it did not stop the ramifications of what this family was going through. Some time passed, and I never did see any kind of follow-up on the news. I then did what a relative terms "creeping" on Facebook. I remembered the family's name, so it was a fairly simple search. Bingo, they had a Facebook page dedicated to their child's predicament. The group was open and public, so I could see everything without actually asking to join. I perused a bit, seeing that at that point in time the child seemed to be all right. If not all right, then at least stable.
At this point, not knowing these people, I will admit my occasional "creeping" was probably more entertainment, putting it crudely. I found myself wanting to check in every once in a while to make sure this child was doing okay. What possessed me when I didn't even know these people? I'm not sure, but the parents were very good at submitting updates to the group to let all the concerned members know what was going on.
My "check-ins" were innocent enough, it's not like I ever asked to join. I was content to look in every now and then to see happy little tidbits of what looked like a return to normalcy for these folks that I did not envy. All that changed about a month or so ago. I happened to look up the group, as I had not done a check-in for a while. I felt my heart get a bit heavier as I read about the latest development with the health problem. Sadly, the child seemed to be going downhill. At this point all of my contact about this family is still just social media, but the updates were flying thick and fast. My frequency of looking in went WAY up. I could sympathize. I asked to join at this time, as I was looking in daily, and it just felt right. Now the updates were showing up on my feed, making it that much easier to look in. I have never met this family, yet here I am feeling as if they have allowed me a front row seat to the unfortunate drama in their lives. As soon as mention of a gofundme page was posted, I was checking it out, and making a donation seemed like the most natural and right thing to do. I was grateful that my own children didn't have the burden and fear of a life-threatening illness crushing them. I have sat in the hospital with my own sister through her cancer burden, remembering how hopeful I felt, even as the "treatment," made her sicker. She seemed to have the right attitude,so I had every reason to think she would kick the big C's ass to the curb. She did for a time. Sadly, the big C did end up winning in the end. I don't know if it's because I know so few true cancer survivors, that I find myself rooting for people fighting the good fight.
What got me was the sheer volume of comments and interest in every update. If a day or two went by with nothing new, I would find myself wondering, then hope that "no news is good news." I also reminded myself that the family was looking out for their 1st priority, their sick child. It made me realize that we never truly know another's perspective. I remember lots of hospital visits were mostly sitting around, especially if my sister was in the middle of chemo, or sick from some complication of her disease. Maybe that's when this family found it most advantageous to post updates they wished to share with their Facebook audience. I wouldn't know, as Facebook did not exist at the time of my sister's illness. I'm not certain she would have wanted us to share photos of her at her worst anyhow. Somehow, I wouldn't feel right taking a bunch of photos of being ill in hospital. That might just be me though! I will state that I am not slamming anyone who practices this. Maybe this is a way to see a journey on social media.
What got me was well-meaning folks asking for updates! I understand how they felt, but it seemed super-forward to actually ask! Someone came on and gave a cyber-tongue lashing to folks asking for updates. It may have come from a well-intended place, but all I could think is, how presumptuous! It's is the family's page, and I think it is only their place to decide the frequency of updates.
All of this got me thinking, social media is seen primarily as entertainment, but there are aspects of it that can hit a deep emotional chord. Folks think there is disconnect when we are online, but I can disagree. I find myself feeling attached to people or causes I might otherwise not have known existed. I may have otherwise just seen this story on the news and let it recede to the murky depths of my memory. I may have wondered from time to time, without ever finding out how it was going.
With all the BS going on in this world of ours, I'm all for social media to make me more aware, sympathetic, and possibly even active where I can make a difference, even if it is a small one!
